Friday, March 11, 2011

...Can't bring myself to get out of bed...

What the hell is wrong with me? I am so blah and down that I have barely gotten out of bed today. I'm skipping class, I feel exhausted, my body hurts all over, and I am just down.
CB is due home shortly and I feel nothing....
I didn't change the number on either of my countdowns, haven't done the happy dance, and haven't even shouted "my boyfriend is coming home" today.

I think all the anxiety and stress has taken a final toll on me today and wiped me out. I still am worrying about a million different things.
Cece is insistent that I sleep over the night before, she doesn't seem to understand that sleeping in your boyfriends empty bed in a house that some bitch took over isn't appealing.
She is also insisting that we go out that night.
Then my mother put a whole other set of worries in my head. My mom and I were reading over the integration package I was sent, since I couldn't make the meetings, when we realized I should have asked for one in french for Cece. She is so caught up in herself and so far removed from the situation that I'm scared she will not think before she opens her mouth.
How else am I suppose to figure out what time she wants me over at to get his place ready if she wont return my calls. It's been a few days now, and nothing. I even left her a message on facebook to say call me when you have a second, still nothing.  Hmm...maybe this will work out to my advantage. If she doesn't call me back I don't have to take her with me!!!

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